1,000 Miles Away
It's morning time, wonder where you are -
wonder who you're talking to
wonder if the sun has risen where you are
it's morning time, i miss your hands on my skin
this bed's too big without you
oh god, what do i do?
I'm a thousand miles away, and I'm lying next to you.

The sun shines golden, and I feel like my car
a little run down, a little beat up, maybe just a little green
maybe it's my battery, maybe it's my starter,
maybe my heart's too weak
there's just this feeling, thought I had to get going
got too scary, got too big, got to get out of here
but now i don't know how to get home.
oh god, what do I do?
I'm a thousand miles away, and lying next to you.

Mama says take my vitamins,
daddy says "girl, don't stay out so late"
sister says "there's other fishes in the sea"

but love is not a rational thing, and my heart is beyond advice
no, love is not a rational thing
oh god, what do I do?
I'm a thousand miles away, and lying next to you.

these fields stretch out like patchwork, on my granny's quilt
she used to tell me that
"life is a series of strange and mysterious things
one minute you think you're up, the next you find you're down"
your mind says "girl, you gotta stick around"
but your heart says "I'm too weak in the knees"
oh god, what do I do?
I'm a thousand miles away, and lying next to you.


Absence Of Fear
Inside my skin
There is this space...
It twists and turns
It bleeds and aches

Inside my heart
There's an empty room.
It's waiting for lightning;
It's waiting for you

I am wanting, and...
I am needing you
To be here
Inside the absence of fear

Muscles and sinew
Velvet and stone...
This vessel is haunted
It creaks and moans

My bones call to you
In a separate skin.
I make myself translucent
To let you in, boy...

I am wanting, and...
I am needing you
To be here
Inside the absence of fear

There is the splendor of this 
Secret inside of me
And it knows that you're no stranger,
You're my gravity

My hands will adore you 
Through all darkness, and they will
Lay you out in moonlight 
And vent(?) your name

For I am wanting, and...
I am needing you
To be here...
I need you near...
Inside the absence of fear.


Angel Needs A Ride
Said, "Angel, Do you want a ride?"
Said, "Angel, I'm tired and I'm lonely
And I need somebody by my side"
It's a long road that stretched from Vegas to nowhere
But it'd been an even longer time
Since he found some piece of mind
And he lived off of bubblegum and cigarettes
And got his nourishment from all-night stores
Thought he'd just keep driving
Til he outdrove his sorrow
He said, "Angel, Oh do you want a ride?"
Said "Angel, I'm tired and I'm lonely
And I need somebody by my side"
Her feet were warm and tired
But as determined as a soul
She left with no regrets
But also no posessions did she own
Her heart was as fragile as her thin, loving arms
She's praying to god to take away her lonely
When he pulled on aside of the road
And he said, "Angel, Oh do you want a ride?"
Said, "Angel, I'm tired and I'm lonely
And I need somebody by my side"
The highway goes on forever
I've seen a thousand men like him before
And I've seen a thousand angels that
Got into the car
They're just a couple of lost souls
Looking to rekindle some sort of forgotten dream
I hope they find what they're looking for
In the solace of the road
They said, "Angel, Do you want a ride?"
Said, "Angel, I'm tired and I'm lonely
I'm tired and I'm lonely
I'm tired and I'm lonely
I'm tired and I'm lonely
And I need to have somebody
By my angel


Been Down So Long
The sun sets across the ocean
I'm a thousasnd mile from anywhere
And my pocketbook in my heart
Both just got stolen
And the sun act like she don't even care
The wind blows cold when you reach the top
Feels like somebody's face is stuck to the bottom of my shoe
Got a plastic jesus and a ...???... corner of my room
Got everybody but you tellin' me what to do
***
Well I've been down so long
It can't be that much longer still
And I've been down for so long
That the end must be drawing near
***
I looked to everybody but me
To answer my prayers
Until I found an angel in the bathroom
Who said she didn't see anybody who was savin anywhere
And the blind man said, "Simple... like flipping a coin -
Don't matter what side it lands on
So long as it's somebody else's dime"
Cause if you're the top of the bottom
It all feels the same
We live out of fear if we're too rich or we're too poor
Fuess all I can do is museter up some change
And  little bit of faith
And take some dignity when I walk through this door

*** (Chorus)

Gonna take a trip
Catch a train
Got a ticket in my hand
And then a fat man takes my money
And like cattle we all stand
I'm just a faceless body lost in this vast and worthless sea
In a thousand people I do not know
But really they are no different from me
They all have passion
They all have fear
They all have intense confusion
And no sweet moments that are clear
They all have aspirations
High hopes and dreams
And are really that alone like me
***
We've been down so long
It can't be that nmuch longer still
We've been down so long
That the end must be...
The end must be...
The end must be drawing near


Breaking Up
Do not think it hurts me bad
It doesn't hurt me none
It does not mean anything
I'm fondling this gun
And I don't hurt that bad
And I don't miss you
I don't eat alone
Wishing I was eating with two
It's like a sad movie
They always get high ratings

In fact I feel like celebrating
I feel like celebrating

And do not think I ever thought that
This would really work
It was just sort of a casual thing
Like trying on a shirt
I don't sit home slone and stare
At your picture wishing that
You were still there
I never get lonely
In fact I'm probably masturbating

In fact I feel like celebrating
I feel like celebrating

Oh goody! Oh joy!
I'm finally free
I no longer have to sit through
Your mother's casserole recipes
Oh joy! Glee!
I'm finally free


Carnivore
(Transcribed by Tom Proven)

So much space can fit inside
More than words can say
I'm left here with my hands all awkward
Trying ???

I used to know you
But not anymore
Your substance has been subtracted
Word by word 

Silence in my ears
Where once you offered your conviction
Your promises are ???
That crack with nostalgia

But, that's all right
That's okay
Had no business
Giving myself to you anyway

Be careful next time for sure
And I'll never trust my pink fleshy heart
I'll never trust my pink fleshy heart
To a Carnivore
Carnivore

Your soul is an ink stain
???

You're as fragile as your thoughtlessness
As strong as you can bend

You could only believe in ???
Had all your high hopes through a telescope
And lavender haunted you
So I go on in life in yellow

You have a fire down in genius, subtlety
And you slip through the fingers of ambiguity

Well, that's all right
That's okay
Had no business
Giving myself to you anyway

Be careful next time for sure
And I'll never trust my pink fleshy heart
I'll never trust my pink fleshy heart
To a Carnivore

I did it before
But I don't think I'll do again
This time
I take back my soul
And my poetry
This time I won't be so easy to read

I'll never trust my pink fleshy heart 
To a Carnivore 


Circle Song (With You I Will Always Be)
(Transcribed by Tom Proven)

If you see me speak without words
Know that I am speaking of the wind
And if you see my words like wind
know that soft tongues cut through stone
And if you see my words like stone
Know its wisdom lies in silence 
and if you see my wisdom in silence
Then with you I will always be

And if you doubt my true love is true
Just see how you have no chains upon your hands
And if you see you wear no chains
You are free like poor men
And if you see your freedom in being poor
(How or You are?) pleased you'll be with the treasure of your mind
And if you're pleased with the treasure of your mind 
Then with you I will always be

And if you wonder how it is that I ___?(am?)
Just watch the sun set slip away (space between sun and set intentional)
and as you watch that sun slip away
know some things are better left unseen
And if you know things are better left unseen 
then night shall carry you in her arms
and if you see I carry you in my arms
Then with you i will always be
With you I will always be


Daddy She's A Goddess
(by Jewel Kilcher and Steve Poltz: Transcribed by Tom Proven)

Refrain:
Daddy she's a goddess
Can we keep her tonight?
Daddy she's a goddess
Watch her move
Her hair so clean when she skin's so smooth
Her nose don't drip like me
Daddy can we keep her please please please
Oh yeah yeah

Saw her walkin' late at night by the liquor store
Set down my Lucky Lager and followed her out the door

Pretty young thing should know better than to walk home alone
So I saw my duty, hadda take her home

(refrain)

Sister likes to feel her up
Late at night
Use her body for a dartboard
And pin her up right

Oh bullseye there it is again
It's always so fun, cause with you I always win

(refrain)

Read the paper
(?)check the brass
You're never gonna find that
(?)body grass
She likes it here
She told me so
She cries Oh baby
(?)takes all the bowls of coal

(refrain)

Ain't never gonna find us mountain men
(? Cause her or In case of) sister got boring, we won't be bored again
She's so fine, she's a hillbillies dream
Up here in the mountains, you can't hear her scream

(refrain)

Daddy she's a goddess..yodel-ay-hee hee
Daddy she's a goddess..yodel-ay-hee hee
(various improv on this until..)
Daddy she's a goddess
doo doo doo doo doo doo daddy
Daddy she's a goddess
doo doo doo doo doo doo daddy
Daddy she's a goddess
doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo Daddy


Dance Between Two Women
Thank you for the flowers you brought me today
And thank you for the kindness you showed me today
No love can be stronger than between two strong women

No man can ever know the dance between two women
We can dance... My lady... May I have this dance?
Thank you for the wisdom the knowing from inside
And thank you for the comfort only a woman can provide
No man can ever know the dance between two women
Love can't be stronger than between two strong women
We can dance... My lady... May I have this dance?
Thank you for the strength without a need for power

And thank you for the rhythym, the sacred circle
Love can't be stronger than between two strong women
No man can ever know the dance between two women
Like you and I
We can dance... My lady... May I have this dance?


Deep Water
(Transcribed by Tom Proven)
When you find yourself falling down
Your hopes in the sky but your heart like grape gum on the ground
And you try to scrape yourself up
But you keep seeping out like cheap gin through a broken cup
And you try to find yourself
In the abstractions of religion and the cruelty of everyone else

And when you're standing in deep water
And you're bailing yourself out with a straw
When you're drowning in deep water
And you wake up making love to a wall
Well it's these little times that help to remind
It's nothing without love
Love, love, it's nothing without love
It's nothing without love

When you realize your only friend
has never been yourself or anyone who cared in the end
And you wake up to see all your dreams have been compromised
Our standard of living somehow got stuck on survive
That's when suddenly everything fades or falls away
Cause the chains which once held us are only the chains which we've made
We sacrifice our pride, sacrifice our health
We must demand more, not of each other, but more from ourselves

Cause when you're standing in deep water
And you're bailing yourself out with a straw
When you're drowning in deep water
And you wake up making love to a wall
Well it's these little times that help to remind
It's nothing without love
Love, love, it's nothing without love
It's nothing without love


Emily
Woke up to find
I lost my mind
Lost heart, lost nerve
I lost my favourite word -
Emily
I take my cigarettes
I give 'em a smoke
Oh god
My heart feels froze
I've lost something it seems
I've misplaced my favourite thing -
Emily
***
Where does love go
If it can't find a home
One moment here then gone
With no forwarding address
Love no longer has a house
Or residence in flesh
***
Take the keys
I get in the car
To out run this
man I'd have to go real far
Where mercy wears lace
And bottles are thieves
Which of these took you from me?
Emily
I face myself
But there's this draft inside

Parts of me drowned
In perpetual tide
I wanna call names
I wanna throw things around
But no bar can buy
Forgiveness another round for
Emily
***
I go to the bedroom
Turn on the light
It's like an empty altar
No angel in sight
religion with no temple
No place to take my worship to
No god for my eyes to see
No fruit to lay at the feet of
Emily
Gone
Gone


Everything Breaks Sometime
Under the shadows, forbidden and hot
Desire grows, more often than not

I'm sorry's a stupid thing to say
Especially considering it's not like I planned it this way

But I'm sorry is all that there is left of me
I'm so sorry this love made me hollow and left you empty

Maybe I could have loved you better
Maybe you should have loved me more
Maybe our hearts were just next in line
Maybe everything breaks sometime
Everything breaks sometime

It's hard to believe its boiled down to this
It seems so surreal this won't be healed by a kiss
It's hard to stare at you knowing you like I have
I used to feel so close, now I feel so bad

My heart's filled with thunderstorms and I'm ready to burst
And I've lost my favorite harbor and I'll weather for the worst

Maybe I could have loved you better
Maybe you should have loved me more
Maybe our hearts were just next in line
Maybe everything breaks sometime
Everything breaks sometime
I'm so sorry,
everything breaks sometime


Food Stamp Love
(by Jewel Kilcher and Steve Poltz: Transcribed by Tom Proven)

MMMMMMMMMMMM, yeah yeah yeah woh woih woh yeah

I'm outside your window
talking through glass
you throw out some love crumbs
but I've got an appetite bigger than that

I'm hungry for something...yeah yeah yeah
that I can't afford
you dole out your love like foodstamps
Well I want something more

Sick of your foodstamp love
Sick of your foodstamp love
Sick of your foodstamp love

You hand me some paper...yeah yeah yeah
show me where to sign
If I'm lucky I will get your number
Oh goody I think this is a real good time

After you ask me some questions
Do I qualify?
Well I don't want your handouts anyway
cause boring stuff is all I can buy

Sick of your foodstamp love
Sick of your foodstamp love
Sick of your foodstamp love

[guitar solo]

I run to my mailbox
hoping that it's there
some sort of message telling 
me that you really care

but all there is is junk mail
there's a sale down at the mall
there's some coupons for canned love baby
but there's nothing from you at all

sick of your foodstamp love (x6, with guitar work behind)


Fragile Heart
You better take your watch off
When around large machinery
You better hide your wallet
If you plan to sleep with theives
Don't forget your bullet-proof vest
The next time you pick a fight with a guard
And if you work with unstable objects
Wear a hat that's hard

CHORUS
It's simple tips like these
That keep you safe from injuries
The surgeon general should do his part:
Warning, beware, be careful - Fragile Heart

Take out your contact lenses
If you drive through a dust storm
Look both ways before crossing
The freeway of any legal form
Take off your antique jewelry
The next time you jump into a chlorinated pool
And don't forget, build a fence around your heart
The next time you give it to a fool

CHORUS

Take your socks off the heater, man
You know they're gonna get burned
Don't lend out your favourite pair of pliers
Unless you're sure they'll get returned
You would not give a shiny medal 
To someone who don't work for it
So do not give of yourself
To one who won't adore it

CHORUS



Here When Gone (with extra verse)
I am a woman haunted by hands
Even though I'm alone
Traces of Pompey
Across my skin
And an invisible map
Of where you've been
It's dry road to Idaho
A thirsty tongue across the land
And soil so dry
You could swallow and entire man
Took the first road out of town
Hoping that you were just skin deep
Well I feel you like
Some sort of phantom limb
Beside me when I sleep
Cause you are here when gone
You are here when gone
You are here when gone
You are here when gone
I watch another grey day unfold
It's dusty wings
Sometimes I wish I were more like
Rocks and stones and things
Sometimes I wish my heart
Were not like flowers at all
That way I wouldn't get butterflies
When you called
begin extra
	And the night swallows itself
	You can see it in the stars
	The moon blinks it's tired eyes
	I may be a thousand miles to nowhere
	Does that make me lost or found?
	Oh - is it that relative to if you're around?
end extra
And some birds abandon their young
Cause the instinct is too strong to fly
Well I feel like abandoning
My guitar and my books and I'm afraid
I don't know why
Cause you are here when gone
You are here when gone
You are here when gone
You are here when gone


His Pleasure Is My Pain
A man stands in the doorway like a small child
angry fists
she lies on her bed her head buried in her pillow
and she stares at the moon
he speaks to her all the words shes heard too many times before
and pretty soon she just let's his voice fade away

and she thinks...

This was a gradual steel frost
that started with cold feet
and ended with numb hearts

This was once satisfying sex but now no longer is

It was once filled with the possibilities of new china or old stone
but now it's exagerated and waterlogged no longer what these
hands had
intended and still I cry in my sleep

He always said I was too sensitive,

but I say

(chorus)

at least I never meant to make him cry.
At least I never meant to make him hurt that way
Nooo I never meant to make him cry
Never meant to make him hurt that way

Yes it's true, I'm too senstive
but he takes pleasure in my pain.
Yes it's true, I'm too senstive
but he takes pleasure in my pain.

And the unheard hours they fly by
she goes to the window
she puts on a nightgown and brushes her hair
he's already asleep
by the time she

goes and lays herself back down.
she thinks

my god, what am i doing hear?

My bones have grown tired of his hunger, of his gray eyes,
and I feel if I were to stay one more night here I'd die or explode
or worse yet just fade away.
There have been days so dark that I felt like august
and that I soon too would turn to fall.
he always said I was too sensitive that if I cared so much
the world could kill me that way.
I wonder if he's only half alive or if he's simply always been this
inarticulate,
cause i say

(repeat chorus)

And she get's out of bed and looks at her feet as though they
were the wings for her freedom
she gets up and goes to the door
it's a moment in which anything can happen
instead she gets out some clothing
puts it in a bag and leaves him sleeping

while she heads for the door.


Hotel Angel
Sweet man, sweet mystery
Unveil yourself to me
Sweet soul, lie so still
Flesh cup, gonna get my fill
Let me rise and fall
With the wings of your sheets
While the moon's full over Austin
The city sleeps below
Only the moon bears witness
To my hotel angel
Through the window
Your body be a tender vine
That twists and turns just like mine
Your heart a slender thong
Built of honey, filled with song
'Til dawn steals you from me
And takes me to the next town
But tonight the moon's full over Austin
And beggars starve below
And only the moon bears witness
To my hotel angel
Through the window
There's one thing that keeps me going
It's the slow and easy knowing
You're the kind of man
Who's kind of girl could maybe give her hand
So sweet man in your sweet misery
Lie upon my temporary sea
Love's dressing, I will adorn
To my side your absence be thorn
And I'll rock you gently to sleep
Tonigh is one promise we both can keep
While the moon's full over Austin
And the city sleeps below
And only the moon bears witness
To my hotel angel
Through the window
Hotel Angel
Through the window


A Housewife's Revenge
Seems like that man took my heart
[Feels]
Laid it neatly out before him on the floor
Then he put on the biggest
heaviest winter boots he had
And stomped on it for three hours,
Maybe four
And I hope his Sorrells are ruined forever
Cause you know he knows how to push my every button

Get down to my last nerve

Like the other day he forgot to put his beer can
In the recycling bin
And he meant to do it on purpose I'm sure
So I might just have to tell him
Why his dog, Ralph, that ran away three years ago
Won't be coming home again
Cause you know he walks around the house
In his underwear
Whenever my girlfriends come around
And perhaps if he were good looking
I might feel a bit jealous, overzealous
But all I feel is embarrassed
Looking at him standing there
And I hope he never finds his left slipper
And my psychiatrist says I should tell him how I feel
He says, "Oh great, I gotta listen to her snivel again"
So I have these little unfulfilled fantasies
Of putting arsenic in his teacup
We'd see who'd be laughing then
If only he was the type to drink tea
Now I hear him come up the driveway
In his El Camino
With its black with a red-flame firebird on front
He keeps the keys to himself
He won't take me out to the movies
Cause of football
So I'll just hold out on something else
I'll never cook him another single Hungry Man TV dinner again
I say, "Listen man, you better treat me with some
r-e-s-p-e-c-t
Cause I gotta a whole lotta what you need
Then a whole lot besides, and then still a whole lot more"

He said, "Yeah, if you were talking about your weight
that might be true - but otherwise all you give me is
Headache and heartburn"
So I took his Hungry Man TV dinner and his Sorrels
So I took his left slipper and his Hungry Man TV dinner
And I spit on his Sorrels as I walked out the door.

And I spit on him as I walked out the door
By the way, your dog Ralph won't be coming home again


I Hate Valentine's Day
(Transcribed by Tom Proven)

Valentine's Day
Wish I had a sweetheart
It's Valentine's Day
Didn't even get a stinkin' card
It's Valentine's Day
I just have to say
I hate Valentine's Day

It's Valentine's Day
And I didn't get no chocolate
It's Valentine's Day
If I had a heart I'd hock it
It's Valentine's Day 
All I have to say
I hate Valentine's Day

It's Valentine's Day
And I hope it finds you healthy
It's Valentine's Day
I'm glad your stinkin' girlfriend's wealthy (?)
It's Valentine's Day
I just love to say
I hate fuckin' Valentine's Day


I've Got The Blues More Than You Do Blues
Grew up in the Mississippi delta
In a shotgun shack
Washboard for my pillow
'Til the tax man took that back
Moved out on my own
I was just twelve years old ... top that

You think you got the blues
Look at my life
I've got the blues more than you do ... blues

When I was an itty-bitty baby
I was my mama's only surviving son
She used my head as a washrag
I thought it was fun
Walked uphill to school both ways
With no legs ... top that

You think you got the blues
Look at my life
I've got the blues more than you do ... blues

Got so drunk i couldn't find my way home
Had to have a blind man show me
When I finally did get there,
My own dog had disowned me
A womam in a bar just looks at me and coughed and said
"I don't even know you, but I wish you'd die off" ... top that

You think you got the blues
Look at my life
I've got the blues more than you do ... blues


In a Woman's Life
(Sung in Santa Cruz, CA on February 26, 1996 Transcribed by Tom Proven)

Somewhere between right and wrong is a love song
Its tongue hits the target but its phone number is always wrong
It speaks through calluses of gentler things
It speaks of kindness
But I don't think you know what that word means 
Your love is a bitter seed that only the blind can see
If this is what love is
Then I guess there's no love song left in me

Somewhere between right and wrong is reality
Justice and shame speak foolishly of impractical things
Your kisses are as kind as candles
your hands are as giving as stone
Your mind is kind as Hitler's until night leaves you feeling alone
Your love is something I must do but never be
If this is what love is
Then I guess there's no love song left in me

I didn't mean to fall into darkness
It's just that I trip in the lights
Cause aw man it's hard to see that clearly and not put up a fight
But I knew I wpould break and not bend
Just look at this trouble I'm in
I need to realize
This is how the unhappy half dies

Somewhere between good and bad is every lie I have ever been told
They all come down but good deeds don't count it's what cards you hold
But I'm tired of your grey laughter
I am tired of your hungry eyes
This love is so rotten
It's startin' to attract flies
Your love is something that must do but never be
Its blade is made of jealousy and insecurity
Your love is a bitter seed that only the blind can see
If this is what love is 
If this is what love is
Then I guess there's no love song left in me.


In a Woman's Life
(Sung in Madison, NJ on April 13, 1996 Transcribed by Tom Proven)

Somewhere between right and wrong is a love song
Its tongue hits the target but its phone number is always wrong
It speaks through calluses of gentler things
It speaks of charity 
but I don't think you know what that word means 
Your love is a bitter seed that only the blind can see
Well, if this is what love is
Then I guess there's no love song left in me

Somewhere between right and wrong is reality
Justice and shame speak foolishly of impractical things
I'm tired of your grey laughter
I am tired of your hungry eyes
This love is so rotten it's starting to attract flies
Your love is something that must do but never be
If this is what love is, then I guess there's no love song left in me

I didn't mean to fall into darkness
I just trip in the lights
cause aw man it's hard to see that clearly and not put up a fight
I knew then I would break and not bend
Just look at this trouble I'm in 
I need to realize
This is how the unhappy half dies

Somewhere between good and bad is every lie I've ever been told
But it all comes done your good deeds don't count it's what cards you hold
Your kisses are as kind as candles
Your hands are as giving as stone
Your mind as kind as Hitler's until night leaves you feeling alone
Your love is a bitter seed that only the blind can see
Its blade is made of jealousy and insecurity
Your love is something I must do but never be
If this is what love is
Yeah, if this is what love is
Then I guess there's no love song left in me 


Jessica
He used to walk with Jessica
Down to the diner
They'd sit and talk for hours
About nothin' in particular
Just bullshit the time away
That's what she used to say
She'd wrinkle her nose when she said it
That's how you know she meant it

Jessica

Jessica


She'd call him at nine a.m.
To see how sleep had been treatin' him
And though they were never lovers
They were soulmates under cover

They'd drink beer and sit around
Or just sit still and not make a sound
And he would shudder to think
Of what life would be like
Without his best friend -slash- shrink

Jessica

Bridge:

She's an angel at his table
A force to feel but not to see
Blinded by her absence
Haunted by her memory
If only you were able to see the angel at your table

He got a phone call
From her mother
He said, "Yeah, right stop kidding around."
He felt his heart fall to the ground
Since then everyday
Seems to feel like winter
Everything is colorless
As he can't see it with her

Jessica

Jessica

He could easily have been with her
Driving home in the car
It was her birthday
It's sick how things work out that way
Now at night when he sleeps
A watch over him she keeps
She whispers in his ear
For his heart to hear

Jessica

Jessica

It's amazing how a soul can leave
Suddenly from a body
Rendering it useless
And stealing its desire to breathe
One moment here then gone
With no forwarding address
Love no longer has a house
Residence in flesh
Religion without a temple
No place to take your worship to
No God for the eyes to see
No fruit to lay at the feet
of Jessica

Jessica

If only you were able to see
The angel at your table
Then you'd understand why
You never got to say goodbye
To Jessica
There's no such word as goodbye

For Jessica

She's always standing by

Jessica


Life's a Great Big Mystery Show
(Transcribed by Tom Proven)

Went downtown just to be a martyr
but a telephone pole beat me to it
it was covered in barbed wire
Saw a little boy's white teeth 
like wild horses encaged by an iron string

Oh god...does not feel good unless he bleeds

And daily crucifictions are hung up on street signs
they use all sorts of names
hope they never use mine
these consonants and vowels 
that cannot scream nor howl
only just hang around

Oh god...how'd things get so turned around

and in the office building
9 to 5 goes on trial
the man is startin to crack
but the ceiling stones smile
and the boss comes in
to see what fragile things
his dull and pointless tongue can tear

Oh god...he combed over a baldspot with a bit of hair

Cause everybody needs 
somebody else to blame
they can't curse themselves 
they take their doctor's name in vain
they'd rather jump through hoops 
and theraputic groups
than in their own minds delve

oh god...why don't we believe in ourselves

Sometimes
I think
Life is just a movie
and these
strangers
are folks we really know
sit back 
relax
enjoy some popcorn
Life's a great big mystery show

Saw tiny faces that are tattered and torn
but there's paint upon the mansion that is hardly worn
I'd like to go inside
but why I don't know
as though I could peel the paint 
and feed it to the poor

oh god...can't live like this anymore

my landlord..no...
my neighbor is as tolerant as a feeding shark
but they tell me that her bite is much better than her bark
she goes ramblin on
from dusk until dawn
sayin I should try bein' like her sometime

oh god...think somethin's died inside her mind

cause 
sometimes...

Life's a great big mystery show


Memoirs Of A Housewife
I have a secret obsession
It's totally tupperware
My own science project
Defying wear and tear
I'm jealous of shopping carts
And all of their brand new things
I want to fondle their labels
In hopes one'll rub off on me

'Cause everybody wants to feel brand new
Like they do

I spend my days indoors
Doing like ding-dongs do
Perfectly preserving
Myself for you

I take things out of their boxes
Take out my note pad and pen
Study carefully

'Cause everybody wants to feel brand new
Like they do

So tell me you want me
Tell me you need me
Tell me I'll always be desirable
Especially to you

Make me feel brand new

Attractive!

Brand spanking clean
And desirable as homecoming queen

But if I were to bet
All of the frenchfries in the world
That you would say such things
I would surely be one very hungry girl

I approach china cautiously
If there's cracks I deny it
I ingest only perfect things
Into my visual diet

And at night I undress myself
In front of your favorite things
Your brand new hand-tied blue bass fishing lure
And in the corner your money clip sings

Everybody wants to feel brand new
Everybody wants to feel brand new
Like they do
As they do
I do too


My Fish Family
There's a man on the front porch
Say's he's related to me
But lately I'm finding
It hard to believe
And this is filled 
With spooks and ghosts
They say they're family
But they are strangers at most

CHORUS
They're strange fishes of the deep blue sea
And absolutely nothing like me
They swim around in their little treasure chests
When it comes to loving me
They give it their fish best
But it's hard with all those scales
Of good and bad, you see (2nd time: Of morality)
They're my fish family
My fish family

And they try and hook me
Or put me in a tank
They may try and book me
For robbing a fish bank
Cause misunderstanding comes easily
When they're blowing bubbles
And I can hardly breathe

BRIDGE (not sung at JewelStock)
And when will they understand
I just wanna marry a man
Without seaweed in his teeth
Without barnacle for hair
Without seaweed in his ears
But their fish ears won't hear me
They're my fish family

CHORUS


Need A Piece Of Your Love Machine
It's been seven hours and sixteen days
Since pollination has come my way
I sit around like dirty cups 'n the spoons
Stacking up around your room
Are you gonna come and pick me up
Stick your finger in my buttercup
What's wrong with me?
Just need a piece of your love machine
The yellow sun is just like chicken soup
Both are wasted if they don't get used
I'm like a petal that needs to be plucked
Come on daddy, Let's duck
all resistance like Vietnam
You be my trader
I'll be your Viet Cong
What's wrong with me
Just need a piece of your love machine
You were my Romeo
I was your Juliet
Hiding in the trash can
We both got wet
You fed me chicken chow-mein
Our love was spicy, yet plain
You built a giant ship and you sailed with it
But now you're gone
Gone
Gone
What's a rose if it won't be smelled
What's a texture if it won't be felt
You wear a plaid like there' no tomorrow
It spills out of the closet
I think that I'll borrow
Some pants or some underwear
There's a trace of you under there
What's wrong with me
Just need a piece of your love machine


Nicotine Love
Go ahead touch me like that
The way you pull my (head or hair) back
Go ahead breathe me in
Bit me til I bleed
This love is like barbed wire running through my veins
Nicotine Love
Go ahead hurt me like that
I've been hurt before
I won't be fixed again
I'm not afraid to sweat
Cause I like the pain and it's familiar to me
And more gentle than most men will ever be
Nicotine Love
*But don't get me wrong
I don't want a friend
Just need you here to help me satsify this childish sin
 hunger so deep
You will melt on my tongue
And I will (punch or put) you to sleep
And I will press you like petals
Til you're fragile and bent
And I'll rid you of...
Nicotine Love
It hurts just right
Not to know your name
But feel that body beneath me
Struggling as though 
As when I was with him
Gonna make you promise 
Than I will crush your heart
Cause I can't
Because it happened to me
Nicotine Love
So come here baby
My honey, cutie-pie
Let my fingers swim like pale fish through your hair
So I can tell you that I love you
Your safe, never let me go
You wonder why 
Nicotine Love
*But don't get me wrong...
So go ahead touch me like that
(The end is drawing near?)
Go ahead hurt me that way
Don't even know enough to fear
You don't know how true it is when you say
My kisses are 
But soon you'll have no more options

Love is like barbed wire
I'm electric and so alone
So come here stray cat
I'm gonna take you home
I'm gonna press you like petals
Til you're fragile and bent
And I'll...
Well I'll...
Nicotine Love


Nikos
She lived in a trailer out eastern road
Her loneliness was a disease
But my daddy couldn't see it though
Her name was Linda her smile was forced
And folks 'round town say she dressed like a divorce
My daddy had a son by her
'though she wasn't supposed to be able
I was eight years old when they told me 'round the table
I looked at my daddy, he looked to the ground

I guessed that we'd be stickin' round ahwile
Might as well smile cause there's no point in being mean
I guess that's just what you get when you forget to dream

Got called to the principal's office
Did I do something wrong?
Doctor on the telephone said,
"Congratulations, you've got a baby brother born."
Got sent to a psychiatrist in case I resented their child.
I was bitter in my anguish but my manner was mild.
My daddy got excommunicated from the Mormon church.
Guess an illegitimate son in God's eye has no worth
He tried to stick around but he flew the coop in spring.
He loved that baby just not Linda it seemed
But still I know we'd be stickin' round awhile
Might as well smile cause there's no point in bein' mean.
I guess that's just what you get when you forget to dream.
So Linda got remarried now my brother called that new man "dad"
But it didn't last long I hear his temper was bad
So she said that we could see him on every other Saturday.
We all were shocked when he called my daddy "uncle"
She said it was better that way.
They tried to get back together but it was off and on
One day she disappeared, I hear to Oregon.
I haven't seen him since. I guess I'm supposed to forget.
That he was my brother too and not just their legal mess

I thought that we'd be stickin' 'round awhile
Might as well smile 'cause there's no point in bein' mean.
I guess that's just what you get when you forget to dream.

This song is for Nikos wherever you may be
I know things were tough but you're okay by me
And your momma ain't a bad person, my daddy's ain't no fool
Sometimes parents just need forgiving too.
PS, I love you, your sister Jewel.
PS, I love you, your sister Jewel.


No More Heartaches
(Transcribed by Tom Proven)

Shut up, sweetheart, I want you to hear
I can no longer love the same thing I fear
I can no longer let myself stay close
To the one thing that hurts me the most
I will not kiss the thorn
Hearts don't need to bleed to know what they're for
There'll be no more heartaches
There'll be no more heartaches for me

I take back my sweetness
It's overlooked by your lust
My song is unseen 
cause your touch is too tough
I don't think your hands know how to adore
The subtlety of me anymore
I unfasten myself from your side 
Slip away, quiet as a sigh
There'll be no more heartaches
There'll be no more heartaches for me

Beds filled with suspicion
Hearts filled with spite
We sleep with thieves
And forego our sights
Too quick to hold 
someone's word over our own
You may be cool
You may know how to flatter
In the end all I have is matter
There'll be no more heartaches
There'll be no more heartaches
No more heartache anymore
anymore, oh oh oh, for me.


Race Car Driver (sped up version)
Come on baby, let's get in the car
I'm gonna take you real, real far
I'm gonna paint your mama's face on the door
You ain't gonna see her anymore
We'll paint a red flamed firebird on front
I will be Evel Knievel, you can double my stunts
This ain't no Malibu Barbie Corvette
This is a real 350 V-8, fuel-injected engine from a private liner jet

[Chorus:]
And I'm going to be your race car driver
Your race car driver

Got studded tires, excuse me if I'm blunt
I've got ribbed rims for her pleasure up front
Got fuzzy dice with a secret door
Full of flavored serums, breath freshener and more
Say, you look smashing by the dashboard light
Come on baby gonna make you feel alright
I'm gonna take you at high warp speed
It's better than watching Star Trek after you smoked weed

[Chorus]
Come on baby, let's get on the road
Let's get on track
And I will grab the wheel like
it was your hair I was pulling back
I'm gonna straddle the line
Swear to God it's gonna take you real far
I'm just a real small man with a real big car
And I'm gonna be your race car driver
So come on baby what's your answer, you gonna cross the line
Ah, quit your sniveling, it's no or yes this time
What you're hungry? We'll stop by Mickey D's* for a happy meal
For a regular hot dog ordeal on wheels
But I can see that you're not impressed
By the way that you are fully dressed
Looks like I'll have to pull out all the stops
I'm a sensitive man of the 90's, sweetheart,
Who cares for your emotional being an awful lot

[Chorus x 2]


Ride Away
Pop works in the shop til eight
Mom's on the phone and she's kind of 
Sally's doing sommersaults on the lawn
Pop slams open the front screen door
Just to scare mom
She says, "What the hell did you do that for?"
He washes his dirty hands in the sink
And things around the table are kind of rough
Mom says it's pa
Pa says, "The times are just tough"
And me and Sally don't say much of nothing at all
The garage door light brightens up the night
Pa always works on cars when he gets in a fight
As though he could figure out that woman by working on that 
 old car
He said a car can cure any problem at all
Cause of looking at all them parts makes a fight look so small 
But I wish he'd just put me and Sally in the backseat and
 drive us away
That's when he sits me down
He says he's gonna teach me about life
He said, "A man needs a car and a boy needs a bike"
I got my first taste of freedom beneath the light of the
 moon
But if it were me
I'd have the guts to put to test those bolts and nuts
And I'd Ride Away so fast, so far
Ride Away... So fast, so far
Put away our tools
We go back inside
Mom feels left out and now she's starting to cry
I wonder if all girls are crazy this way
I wish pops would just get a (spine?)
I said I know it's kind of small but you can borrow mine
He just smiled and said, "Your mom means well son"
Most times are good it's just some that are lean
But it's love that makes up for those times in beteween
He got a tear in his eye as he took mamma's hand
said one day I'd understand
But if it were me
I'd have the guts to put to test those bolts and nuts
And I'd Ride Away so far, so fast
Ride Away so fast so far
Ride Away


See Sassy Wake Up
See Sassy wake up she's in love
Can't you tell by the ring on her finger
Can't you tell by her fifty dollar shoes
That she confuses love with the people she uses
But don't worry about nothing, don't worry at all
It's just a temporary conjunction
Even spring's got to fall

See Sassy wake up, a little girl
She looks so feminine, so fragile, so weak
And Papa said that she's too cute for words
So Sassy never learned how to speak

But don't worry bout nothing, don't worry at all 
It's just a temporary conjunction
Even spring's got to fall

Hush you baby, don't you cry
Papa's gonna buy you some pudding pie
Hush you baby, don't distress
Papa's gonna buy you a real nice dress

As though that could mend your heart
As though it could keep it from being torn apart
As though it were your destiny
To face every man you meet on your knees

See Sassy wake up on the other side
She stares at her wedding dress and starts to cry
She's got big eyes but they don't see too clear
She says, "My god, how did I end up here?"

But don't worry about it, don't worry at all
It's just a temporary conjunction
Even spring's got to fall
Yeah, yeah, yeah...

See Sassy wake up she's in love...
See Sassy wake up she's in love...


Silver Lining
(by Jewel Kilcher and Steve Poltz: Transcribed by Tom Proven)

My muffins are in the toaster
I got my raspberry jam
My grandfather was a sailor
that came onto this land
and he was looking for gold,
a pretty hand to hold,
or some cards to fold.
At least, that's what I was told.

Silver Lining
Silver Lining, where'd you go?

Turn on my TV
They got talking heads in space
used to be so easy
to have a little faith
I used to rely on luck
I didn't feel so stuck
Could earn an honest buck
without lookin round, like Jon Kruk.

Silver Lining
Silver Lining, where'd you go?

I used to have hope
Now we got soap on a rope
I used to have dreams
Now we got overplayed baseball teams
We got grocery baggers, grafitti taggers, 
golf-ball shaggers, go team go.

Silver Lining
Silver Lining, where'd you go?

My landlord knocks upon my door
He's got that payday face
I swear to God he should be payin me
To live inside this place
It's filled with sharks and fins
whose double chins say 
Thicken your skin, child
if you want to win

Silver Lining
Silver Lining, where'd you go?

I fix myself some herbal tea
cause it's healthier they say
well, healthier ain't half as fun
I take a cold beer anyday
I used to have dysfunctional fun
in the cancerous sun
with my co-dependent hon
eatin greasy greasy hotdogs on a buttered up bun

Silver Lining
Silver Lining, where'd you go?
Silver Lining
Silver Lining, where'd you go?

[scat solo]

Repeat refrain. (x2)


Summer Home In Your Arms
You take your coat off and throw it on the floor
Night has built you into my arms once more
You feel so familiar as you get into bed
Cigarette smoke halo around you head
You lean over and kiss me so sweet...
I could lay with you like this for hours...
Hours and hours
Building a summer home in your arms
I kiss you with the languid adiration of slumber
Landin' random as lotto numbers
One for each eye
And, oops, one on your nose
And ten for each of your cute little toes
You lean over and kiss me so sweet...
I could lay with you like this for hours...
Hours and hours...
Building a summer home in your arms
Am I crazy, do I talk too much?
Sometimes I think your silence is a crutch
Am I mad, are you married?
Oh jesus this love stuff can sure be scary
But so sweet... So sweet
Here in your arms
I'm a bit of a mess and I'm gone too much
But when I'm away it's you I long to touch
And certain things remind me it's such a special treat
As these little things that bring you to me
You lean over and kiss me so sweet...
I could lay with you like this for hours...
Hours and hours...
Building a summer home in your arms
I'm building a summer home in your arms
I'm building a summer home in your arms
I'm building a summer home in your arms
Built with all your charms


Train Song (aka Paler Shade of Grey)
(Transcribed by Tom Proven)

I try to recall what it was you said to me just then
but this train keeps on rocking me back to sleep
and I fear come tomorrow I won't even remember your name

I'd make myself remember
Make myself recall
but these promises and these vows I made you now 
seem to have no voice at all
The color of the canyons
When first it was said I love you
But these colors and these canyons 
now all seem silly and small
I don't understand at all
how these colors in my memory just fade 
into such a pale shade of grey

and cold rails remind me of your cold feet
and my eyes expect to see you behind every door
but when I shut my eyes 
I can't even recall what it is that you wore
My god was that only yesterday
I can't even remember your face
I feel so far away

I make myself remember
Make myself recall
but these promises and these vows I made you now 
seem to have no voice at all
The color of the canyons
When first it was said I love you
But these colors and these canyons 
now all seem silly and small
I don't understand at all
how these colors in my memory just fade away 
into such a pale shade of grey

*I say to myself My god I used to love him
I wanted to share with him my womb and my world
But now I stare at him as though through a glass wall
I say I used to love him but now I feel nothing for him at all
My god how could this be
Won't you please explain this to me

Now sleep sings to me in a sweet and urgent voice
And I fear that I have no choice but to forget these flowers
these daisies you gave me, the offerings you made me
the vows that we swore by, swearing we'd be together
always and forever, the children we named and now we'll never have
and I know I'm supposed to meet you 
I don't even think I'll remember your name tomorrow

I make myself remember
Make myself recall
but these promises and these vows I made you now 
seem to have no voice at all
The color of the canyons
When first it was said I love you
But these colors and these canyons 
now all seem silly and small
I don't understand at all
how these colors in my memory just fade away 
into such a pale shade of grey


A Very Big Girl
They say you're feeling charitable
And that she's just a helpless little girl
You say she needs counseling 
But I find it hard to believe
Cause baby looks like 
A very big girl to me

You say she's harmless
I don't know about that
She's just a kitty but to me 
Looks like a very capable cat
What'cha say about that?
You say she's unattractive,
She doesn't turn you on
But that expression on your face
Ain't exactly a yawn
You say she needs advising
But I find it hard to believe
Caus baby looks like 
A very big girl to me

Yeah that cupcake 
Don't exactly look like no hostess to me
Cause baby looks like
A very big girl to me


You're So Small
Gonna walk down the street
and seduce every man I meet
because I'm having a bad day.
I am 
not size six.
My legs are not 
skinny as sticks
and dammit, someone's got to pay.
(That's the power of a woman, ohhhh)

I feel unattractive.
I'm gonna see if it's true.
I'm going to break a heart or maybe two.
I'm gonna put on a sexy red thing
Gonna run every ??? (sounds like lake, or late, or wait)
I'm gonna pull some strings
Cause my strength is in my 
power over you.
(the power of a woman)

But I'm afraid that I can't satisfy myself
And that my happiness depends on someone else.
I feel weak, so you're gonna take the fall.
You're so small, you're so small, you're so small.
You're so small, you're so small, you're so small.
You're so small, I feel fat, you're so small.
You're so small, I don't feel anything, cuz you're so small.


Sunshine Superman
(I Shot Andy Warhol Soundtrack)

Sunshine came softly through my window today
I could have tripped out easy but I've changed my ways.
It'll take time I know it, but in a while...
You're gonna be mine and I know it, we'll do it in style.

Cause I've made my mind up you're going to be mine
I'll tell you right now...
Any trick in the book, oh baby, that I can find.
Everybody's hustling just to have a little scene.
When I say we'll be cool, well, I think that, you know what I mean.
We stood on a beach at sunset, do you remember when...
I know a beach where baby, it never ends.

When you've made your mind up forever to be mine.
I'll pick up your hand and slowly, blow your little mind.
Cause I've made my mind up you're going to be mine
I'll tell you right now...
Any trick in the book, oh baby, that I can find

Superman or Green Lantern ain't got, nothin' on me.
I can make like a turtle and dive for pearls in the sea
You can just sit there thinkin', on your velvet throne
About all the rainbows you can have for your own.

When you've made your mind up forever to be mine.

I'll tell you right now...
I'll pick up your hand and slowly, blow your little mind.

When you've made your mind up forever to be mine.
I'll pick up your hand and slowly, blow your little mind.

I'll tell you right now...


Under The Water
(The Craft Soundtrack)
(Written by Jewel Kilcher & Ralph Sall)

Bees are buzzin' in their honey catacomb
All the noise seems to call my head a home
Can't escape the scratchin'
My blood makes a noise
It's hard not to play when there are so many toys
So many toys

Under the water
The total is more than the sum
Under the water
I hear who I'll become

There's a hole inside my head where all the thoughts break out
Sometimes my flesh is filled with forgetfulnes and doubt
It's easy to feel separate, no control of the reigns
Innocence ain't lost it just needs to be maintained
It needs to be maintained 

Beside me are strange fish, moody and dark
A tapestry of intention that maintains the spark
And there's a tiny light
A flicker within
Forgiveness is the needle that knows how to mend
It knows how to mend

Under the water
The total is more than the sum
Under the water
I hear who I'll become

(Spoken "Rap")
I've decided to hear who we will become
Wanna lay down in the water, go back to where I'm from
Outer space is just a puzzle of stars
Music the mechanics of the human heart
A post that stirs, a shadow that casts
An insatiable thirst drains a martini glass
There's no place sacred, no honest reflection
Our senses made senseless by a lack o' direction
Monks are great with their fists uncurled
But they live in a cave, they know nothin' of the world
I wanna live brave, I wanna love without fear
But it's hard to navigate when I can't even hear

(Do do do do do do do,
Do do do do)

Bees are buzzin' in their honey catacomb
All the noise seems to call my head a home
Can't escape the scratchin'
My blood makes a noise
It's hard not to play when there are so many toys
There're so many toys

Under the water
The total is more than the sum
Under the water
I hear who I'll become

Under the water
My flesh is filled with stars
Under the water
I hear who we really are

Under the water
I lay my burdens down, down, down
Under the water
All resistance drowns

(Do do do do do do do, Do do do do)
(Do do do do do do do, Do do do do)
(Do do do do do do do, Do do do do)
(Do do do do do do do, Do do do do)
(Do do do do do do do, Do do do do)

Come on, come down, down, down under go,
A-go down on and go down under
Go under the water
I hear who I'll become

Under the water 
I lay my problems down
Under the water
All my resistance drowned